Bad thing out of the way. I was in a car accident today, and not just a fender bender, either. A fender demolisher, airbag deployer, shock inducing wreck. I am completely fine, at least physically. I will try to supply interested parties with the details at a later time, right now I just cannot think about it any more.
Good thing, what I referenced in my last “post,” if you can call one sentence that. I have set up another blog, Ruby’s Gratitude Journal. It is exactly that, and the About will explain it all better than I can right now.
I can share with you why I chose to put it online and tell all of you at this particular juncture in my life.
It’s no secret that things have not been ideal for me lately. I’ve still kept this journal going (in pen and paper form), no matter how much I have had to stretch myself for material. I thought it might be a nice twist if each day I shared the positives only, from the little to the enormous. Let’s face it, it’s all relative anyway.
And like I said in the About (more or less), if I put it out there where all of you can read it, I am accountable and have more motivation to keep up with it daily. I want to close each day with at least one focused, positive thought, even when things are. . . Well, like they’ve been.
It deserves a better intro than the one I’ve given it, but despite that fact I hope you read what I write there and find value in it.
Moral of the story (only not really): ”Say goodnight, Gracie.” ”Goodnight, Gracie.”
So two days ago (8 September 2011), I had my six month anniversary of when I began this blog with my first post, The ‘Miracle Max’ Moment. It’s a little different from (but also much the same as) the type of posts I have come to write since. It’s a bit of a process to get from throwing out a random thought and seeing what happens to it to letting anything and everything fly and not giving a rip who may be reading it and how they may respond.
For the record, I’m proud to have gotten here from there. And thank you to everyone who reads what I write, and who has been brave enough to subscribe and be inundated with my ramblings on a near-daily basis. A very special thank you to those who have stuck out my moods and my life, in non-blog interaction (of course), but also specifically among the bloggers I know, and those I ‘kind of’ know.
I am good at times, I comment and reply to comments and give quality feedback on posts on other blogs (I think, anyway). And then there are the times – recently, for example – that I turn almost completely to myself and my world. I may read, but I don’t comment. I may not return emails or reply to comments on this blog for days. I may struggle to do anything, both online and off.
But this blog has been my lifeline. Lately, if nothing else I try to make myself post each day. Sometimes I just fiddle around with the bright work (the behind-the-scenes stuff that usually no one can really pinpoint, but makes the experience better for everyone). But this thing truly is my baby.
Thanks also to all of the bloggers who have decided to help in painting Canvas with their wonderful Minds. ;P Lulu, Always, ManicMuses, Novalee, and Manic Monday - you are all wonderful, and you occupy a special place in my life. Being the site’s Admin (though not the only one behind the concept, ahem, Lulu) has given me a taste again of something I wasn’t sure if I was ready to handle, and it has done it in such a way as to not overwhelm me, or even really show its true face until I was well past the biggest hurdles (well, we’ll see about the hurdles part).
It has given me a responsibility and accountability to others. It may not seem like much, and at the moment we’re in a place where there aren’t too many things I need to do in an Admin capacity (except for recruit more bloggers, we really want for you to join your voice to the chorus, everyone). But there have been other times, with setup and implementing new ideas and contacting bloggers individually and all the various and sundries. . .
In any case, it’s different from writing this here blog in so many ways. Not just in that I have a responsibility to other people (though I do), but also in that what I contribute there has to be more ‘focused and directed,’ and less ‘rambling whatever’ – the way I write here. :D So I am honing my craft as well.
I decided that six months of good, solid work here – I haven’t posted every day, but I averaged it out to 23 posts a month – deserved a reward. If you are highly observant, you may have already noticed something a little different (and no, not the background color). If you are a subscriber and are reading this in your inbox, I think you have to actually visit the page for this to work. It’s alright, we don’t mind waiting for you. . . Are you here now? Good.
Now everyone look upward, all the way to the top of your screen, almost. . . look at the search bar. . . look at my address, my URL. . . Notice anything? Notice anything missing?
Yep. I have my own domain, no more .wordpress.com, just .com!
It’s really much more symbolic than anything. WordPress still hosts my blog, but I feel more now like it is in fact my blog. It may seem like a baby step, a little tweak at most, and in a way it is. But in another way it’s a huge leap from where I was. I inched along in itty bitty bits, but I got so far.
I think the biggest factor involved is the symbolism. Because doing this was a big, scary thing for me. It was an acknowledgement that yes, I have done something worthwhile and kept up with it, and it was a sort of vow to myself that I will continue to do what I love and I will grow it and expand it in any way that I can.
Happy girl. Actually. . .
(This song and video are solely the property of their respective owners and artists. Absolutely no copyright infringement is intended.)
And as it happens, I opened my curtains this morning for the first time in ages, I swear with no conscious motive other than to let in the light. I thought in the moment it was pure practicality, but it makes me wonder now.
Moral of the story: I am Ruby. See me shine.
(And in case you’re confused or concerned, you can still enter in my old address with the .wordpress.com and it will re-direct you here.)
