I don’t mean for that to sound conceited (although of course it’s going to). I mean it in the classic, absent-minded professor, Albert Einstein, Felix Hoenikker (Cat’s Cradle, Kurt Vonnegut, read it) sort of way. To wit – when something really interests me, I get engrossed in it completely, to the exclusion of all extraneous stimuli. I fail to notice the phone, my inbox, my stomach, even my bladder, until it is really causing me serious pain. And after I do eventually succumb to the need to relieve it, I dive right back in where I left off.
As an example, today I’m going to try something new. Add a little “something extra” to this post. Photos. WOW!
Preface: I have a 35mm camera. I love my 35mm camera. I don’t go for the whole digital thing. I think it makes it easy for people with no actual talent to imitate good photographers, because they can look and know exactly what they’ve shot immediately, delete what they don’t like, and edit the hell out of all the pictures they keep to make them ‘perfect.’ With a 35mm you have to consider and set up each shot carefully, because whether it’s brilliant or it’s trash, you’ve used an exposure and you cannot un-use it. That’s isn’t to say that there are not excellent photographers out there whose use digital, but until I can afford their $9000 worth of equipment (read: never), I will continue to be a total snob and love what I do with my camera.
Here’s the thing, though. A few years ago, a friend was selling a cheap digital at a garage sale. I thought, What the hell, why not?, and grabbed it. I don’t think she even made me pay. I came across it tonight, and I found some really gorgeous pictures on it. More importantly, I wanted to show all of you what I did last night, and the extent of my madness.
So. No installation instructions, no cord, no software, just this camera. I found a USB cord and plugged it into my laptop, because thankfully if you are the complete antithesis of tech-savvy like me, everything these days is pretty much plug-and-play. Yeah, not this particular camera. I connected it to the computer – nothing. I tried searching for it in my devices – not there. I’m thinking, Lovely. A digital camera that cannot be connected to a computer is officially the most worthless, useless piece of junk ever. The damned thing was mocking me.
Well fuck that, I am certainly not going to let a camera defeat me! I went to the manufacturer’s website, downloaded all sorts of software, and viola!, suddenly my computer recognized the camera. Hah.
Except. The freaking thing uploaded and then hid all of my pictures. I think it even deleted some (on the computer, not the camera). But I am me, and the more that this thing tried to screw with my head, the more focused and intense and creative I got, and many hours later. . . I HAD MY PICTURES! Take that, you mediocre bastard child of technology.
Back to my madness. If I had remembered that I had this camera last night, I could have documented this whole five-hour process for you. The organization of my makeup area. As it is, you’ll just have to look at the final product and use both sides of your brain. If you cannot get an idea of why this task took five hours, you are either supremely unimaginative, or a guy. Or both.

Look at all of that makeup!

Not so fast, that wasn't the half of it!

And there is the rest. Almost. Pretty much.
Those are all Bare Escentuals products. It is also all makeup. I have skin care products, and home spa goodies – I am not going to tackle that stuff anytime soon. ;)
I have been wanting to organize this. . . mixed-up treasure trove for months. I’m not sure why, but I finally got motivated. It had to do with the fact that I have seldom been using makeup anymore, which led naturally to the hypothesis that this phenomenon might be manifesting because I could not find anything.
So there you go. How I spent the last six hours.* Oh, no joke. From sitting down, trying to get the camera to work with my computer, to creating this post, that is how long it has taken. I think that I got up to pee once.
Moral of the story: Determination. Get creative, think logically, do not give up.
Incidentally, those pics aren’t too bad for a cheap digital. But I’m also not looking to enlarge them. That’s where things get especially inferior with a digital, unless it’s top of the line.
*Seven, now that I’m through editing.
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